Angela's Blog

Hola.

I don't know if anything on the outside is different or better but the inside is much improved. I feel a ton better! I think my arm is making little progress but it still has reduced mobility and stitches in it. And the pins and needles are still around and just as frustrating as they ever were. But my outlook is so much better.

I actually feel like I'm getting better headed back to my old self. This is all new because up to this point I felt like I was getting better headed to my new handicapped self. Finally I don't feel that way any more. I actually feel like me for the first time, just hurt. Pretty amazing! It doesn't seem like being back to 100% is never going to happen anymore, it just seems like a little ways off while I heal. It seems like it's coming up not far off in the distant future anymore. Yesterday I was even imaging when me and Josh have kids. And it really didn't seem all that future-ish.

I don't know what spawned this change but I'll take it. Feels a lot better to be me right now. Now I know that technically this is supposed to be a really hard time with lots of work but it really doesn't seem like an insurmountable task right this minute. It doesn't even really seem like I'm all that tough or tenacious. Just doing what needs to be done, that's all.

I had another amazing shift of context over this weekend too. I have always HATED my shower chair. It has always made me feel handicapped and different than I used to be. But this weekend my frame of mind shifted and now I just see it as a tool. It is just my helper in the shower. It no longer has any worth associated it. It just is. Pretty cool, huh?!?

I think maybe this is just a big fat answer to prayer. Or maybe it's a side effect of the cranial Chinese medicine work I had done last week. Whatever it is I like it! I think it's most likely a Holy Spirit stepping in and enveloping me and protecting me from myself and the enemy. Thank you, Jesus! Way to step in and shut up all my negative self-talk!

I'm sure this was a refreshing post to read. Finally she's not bitching about how everything hurts and how bad her life sucks. Hope you enjoyed it. And throw up a little prayer of thanksgiving if you get a minute. God is hard at work here!

Thanks,

Ang